Friday, June 30, 2017

Why I'm in Canada, eh!

150   Happy Birthday Canada   150
I am Canadian! 

My grandparents came here in 1929 from Hungary.  They came over on a ship and landed in Halifax. My father was the baby in the family and the only one to marry a Canadian.  The rest of his siblings married Hungarians. My husband came here in 1974 from Italy.  He arrived on an airplane.  

My grandparents came here for freedom.  My husband stayed here for a better future for his family. Me?  Well I was born here!  I am Canadian, eh!

My husband didn't want to come here but his parents insisted that he come to keep an eye on his sister.  She had just got married at 17 to her finance who ended up living and working here for a few years after the engagement. Her Papa said to her fiance of three years - "If you don't come back and marry my daughter, the engagement is off."  So he came back to marry her and off they went to Canada!!  Her Papa was shocked, and very sad that his daughter left.  I guess he didn't realize that's what would happen.

When my husband went to the consulate in Rome to get approval to be a landed immigrant.  He told them he didn't want to leave his country.  He was a bum.  Didn't want to work etc etc.  His plan was to not get their approval.

Guess what they gave him his landed immigrant status anyway!!  The Italian family started to dream. Their dream was to all come to Canada work hard and then build a villa in Italy and live happily ever after.  It didn't quite work out that way.  Papa came for a year, another son came for six months. I came into the picture after 6 months.  By the time we applied for the others to come, they had girlfriends and didn't want to come to Canada either.  So the family was split.  Two children here and four in Italy.  My husbands sister ended up staying only 10 years then went back to Italy.  So now my husband is here on his own.  The parents are now gone and we all have created dreams of our own.

When we got engaged all the family were here for their first Canadian Christmas.  What a shock to experience a Canadian winter with its snow and cold winds.  Papa was not happy about our engagement because I was a foreigner!!  How could I be the foreigner, I was Canadian and living in Canada?  Mamma on the other hand encouraged it because we lived together before we got married. That was unheard of back then in a small town in Italy.

We did get married and learned to accept each other speaking the LOUD and romantic language of love.  We had 3 bambino's (babies), who are now married and each have bambino's of their own. What a wonderful life we have in Canada.  Believe me my husband paid a HUGE price by staying here. He missed his family SO much.  Canadian culture is so different than the Italian culture.

I feel blessed knowing two cultures.  It has been a difficult journey raising a multicultural family. Traditions we have created on our own.  Our children are creating traditions of their own.  Thank You Canada for a wonderful life.  I'd like to say Thank You to my husband Vincenzo for choosing to stay in Canada which created a strong and free life for our children.

May your memories of loved ones and days gone by bring a smile to your face for Canada Day.

With Love and Encouragement,
Mamma D Butterfly
Dorothy Sessa
I am Cdn.

Monday, June 26, 2017

A Change of Heart

From cursing cancer to being grateful for cancer!

Thank You Cancer - my experience with you is beyond measure.

I've seen SO many different fonts and sizes of cursing cancer on t-shirts and signs on vehicles. I've listened to SO many stories.

Having spoken from a heart half empty yet overflowing with anxious thoughts I bumped into depression and filled my spirit with sorrow and found myself attracted to the f**k cancer phrase when I was angry.  I didn't like being stuck there so I knew a change of heart was necessary.

My Big G - God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit would not use that word with me so why would I entertain that thought, I thought! So I changed my thoughts.  To hell with cancer where you belong! I was till anxious and found my emotions out of control.  I changed them again!

My story goes like this:  I turned my back on cancer to follow the path of gratitude. Following a path of gratitude one finds a unique way of giving thanks for what has transpired since the story began.

The page has now turned - a new story begins, a ministry of healing.  A healing of the minds!

Choosing to conquer my emotions on this amazing tour with cancer I find that speaking from a heart full of gratitude; a flower in full bloom has opened within me and has turned depression into inspiration.  I feel strong.  I feel strong enough to help others on their tour with cancer.  I feel free. Free from the bondage of toxic negative emotions.  Cancer helped me believe in me and catapulted me to live a life of abundance.  No more victim mentality.  I feel so happy to be me, set free!

May you be inspired and your spirit renewed as you become the tour guide through your life circumstances.

With Love and Encouragement,

D o r o t h y

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Complaint Avenue to Thanksgiving Blvd

Face to Face with a Suicidal Death

Everything I have above nothing, God gave it to me!  The least I can do is say so!

I know where a sick woman can get well.  A good woman can be made better.  A dead woman can be made alive.  As we let go of killing ourselves trying to live, drinking our way to pleasure, smoking our way to settle our nerves; we can also be still and know God and listen to His voice.

When we listen to the voice of God our complaints stop and a journey of gratitude begins.

As I looked back on my past journey on Complaint Avenue in dealing with 'poor me' and looking at who I am today on my journey on Thanksgiving Blvd I asked God a couple of questions.

Thinking about a funeral I was going to go to the next day, these are the questions I asked God.

1.  Why is this person gone and I'm not?  2.  What can I do to help as I live a purpose filled life?

I relived my suicide attempts laying in bed thinking about why I was still here.  On one attempt, I failed.  On the next attempt I heard the voice of God interrupt me.  I obeyed and followed His suggestion.  On the third and final panic attack to take my life, God suggested who I call for help. The help came in asking myself two questions that I had learned in a seminar at a Landmark Education class.  1. What are you feeling?  2.  When did you first feel like that?

The answers which were the truth about my emotional state of mind at that very moment saved my life.  I could let go of believing the lies in my head.

The answers set me free to be 'true me'.  I no longer needed to travel on Complaint Avenue. That's when my journey began on Thanksgiving Blvd.

There is a miracle about to happen in your life.  It's just around the corner.  

. . . . BELIEVE . . . .  BELIEVE  . . . .  BELIEVE . . . .  BELIEVE . . . . 

If I would have followed through on my final panic I would not have witnessed the miracle of birth of my first grandson in 2005.  And now I have 7 little g's.  Seven precious grandchildren.

Share with others the miracles that are happening with awe and wonder so they too can point others to the love and forgiveness of the only God that is ALIVE.

Now back to my story:  My heart began racing as God brought to mind what would help.  I could feel the pull of Courage.  I got up and wrote down the ideas that came to my heart.  May your heart be encouraged as you find the courage to follow through with your ideas.

With Love and Encouragement, 

Dorothy/Mamma D Butterfly 

Friday, June 2, 2017

It's all about love

Love is what it's all about

I went to see my family Dr. two days ago.  I asked for a requisition for blood work.  The test I asked for was for a cancer marker.  I wanted to see where I'm at after 9 months of dealing with breast cancer.  

My appointment was at 9:15 then I had two other places to be as well, so it was a bit rushy and I didn't have time to have a shower and especially to wash my hair.  I walked into the waiting room just on time, sat down.  I was called in immediately.  I got up and quickly followed the receptionist. Speaking out loud, "Good thing I'm taking good care of myself so I can keep up to you!" as I followed her to the room.  She was walking VERY fast down the long hallway.  When I got into the room to wait, my inside thoughts were:  I must look terrible today!!!!!

Then I did something I've never done before.  I turned on my phone and positioned the camera for a selfie.  I looked at myself on the screen.  Then I said, "Heck no, you look great Dorothy."  I smiled at myself then turned off the phone!

I had no idea what that would do or why I did that.  I'm going to say it was from all the soaking I do while listening to Graham Cooke on YouTube. My Big G is very KIND to me and I'm beginning to be KIND to myself too.

A few minutes later the Dr walked in.  We had not seen each other since she gave me the requisition for the mammogram.  She went on maternity leave a few months after I met her for the first time.  It had been 10 months since we met.  She was a new family Dr. for me.  

I stood up shook her hand and congratulated her on being a MoM.  Then she shared how wonderful it was to be a mom and enjoy her baby boy.

Then she looked at me and said, "It's been quite a difficult year for you though!"

I proceeded to tell her about my 'hell to heaven' journey with such passion and enthusiasm.  Because when the train stopped in hell I didn't get off, I kept going!!  I think we were both impressed with my story.  I gave her my new business card for  She asked for it.  She wondered if I was going to be a counselor.  I responded with, "heck no, I'm no counselor, I'm a Speaker, I'm going to encourage women through life and death."  She was surprised.  "Not all cancer survivors can turn it around like that," she said.

Turns out the requisition blood work I asked for would only be done if cancer had gone to another part of the body and you needed to go for a CT Scan.  So I left with out a requisition.  It was a great encounter.  She encouraged me to go see the surgeon for a follow up.  Which I will do in August. Which will be one year after my mammogram.

As I left her office and walked to my car.  I was tickled pink that I had first taken a look at myself. Complimented myself.  I showed up, stood up in Spirit, and spoke up like I had never done before. I was me.  I spoke from the heart.  It was the best elevator speech one could have prepared.  I was on the elevator to heaven, a longer lift than normal.

My Big God has taught me so many wonderful things about who He is and who I am to Him these past 9 months.  My Dr. gave birth to a baby and I gave birth to a Healing Ministry.  How God could use such a broken vessel like me is beyond me.

The next day I picked up my photo's from Costco.  I printed off 35 photo's of  'Courage'.  Getting ready for my next mail out to family and friends.  I prayed about what the message would be on the back.  I spent most of the day thinking and creating what I thought would satisfy me then I get my daughter to help me edit.  She always asks important questions so that clarity comes to me in creating the message.  Thanks to the cell phone moment in the Dr.'s office the result is a revelation.

May you be encouraged as well with my message of courage.  On the back it reads:

My Story Goes Like This:
It Took Courage, to know my Identity 
To let go of a life controlled by emotions.  
I turned my back on cancer, fear and depression. 
To follow the path of gratitude.
It Took Confidence, to be Courageous 
When my emotions tried to fool me.  I turned my ears towards the whispers of Love.  To assure myself that the journey with cancer would create a Ministry of Healing.

It took Love to be Committed - To look in the mirror,  
smile at the woman I am.  I love her.
What does your story look like when Love produces Courage?

I believe when we all know how much My Big G loves us.  We in turn will love ourselves as much. There will be no mental illness, no suicides, no murder, etc.  Why?  Because all we need is Love. Love is all we need.

This is my Story.  This is my Song.  Blessed Assurance

With Love and Encouragement, 

D o r o t h y